Listening to Elliott Connie at a Q&A for the recent Solution Impossible video series with Adam Froerer, I was struck by a metaphor Elliott used for hope.
I find metaphors can be really helpful when wrapping my head around a concept and this one was no exception.
Adam and Elliott spoke about the importance of presupposing the existence of hope in our clients, even when they tell us with their words that they have none. If, said Elliott, we listen to the person, rather than their words, we’ll find it a lot easier to see this hope. After all, the client is there, in our office or on our computer screen, and that alone represents hope.
So what if the client is forced to be there? What if they are required to be there by social services or by the terms of their probation? These situations do not negate hope. Perhaps our client hopes that they can reduce a custodial sentence as a result of attending the session. Perhaps our client hopes that they will gain or maintain access to their child as a result of attending the session. Hope is still very much present, and as Elliott points out, the client can hope for whatever they like. As solution focused therapists we don’t judge. It’s our job to use their hope to help structure the rest of the conversation in a way that can bring about positive change
“Think about hope as a series of helium balloons attached to a person,” said Elliott.
“If I put enough helium in one of the balloons it pulls the entire person up. So it doesn’t matter which balloon I put the helium in.”
I love this idea.
I love the idea of imagining each client with these balloons of hope.
I love the idea that it is my role to ask questions to help the client find a balloon that they can use to pull themselves up.
I love the idea that it is my role to then ask questions to help the client to fill up this balloon with helium so that it lifts them up, up, towards wherever it is they want to go.
Thank you Elliott Connie and Adam Froerer for yet another inspiring course.
To find out more about this video series and others, visit https://www.mastersolutionfocusedbrieftherapy.com/